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Culture guide: 50 things in Surrey to book now

Fast forward to the fun. We can't head out right now, but it doesn't mean we can't plan. Grab your diaries and plot your 2021 comeback. Here's what's on the culture agenda in Surrey in 2021.

COMEDY

Luisa Omielan
Luisa Omielan brings her Work in Progress show to Camberley Theatre on Fri 16 April.

Jonny Awsum Is Coming To Town
■ G Live, Guildford ■ Sat 3 Apr

This is the first solo tour for the Britain’s Got Talent star and will include brand new material together with the greatest hits from his TV and comedy club sets. It’s not one to take the kids along to. glive.co.uk

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Jessica Fostekew: Hench
■ G Live, Guildford ■ Fri 9 Apr

The Guilty Feminist, Jessica Fostekew (Motherland, Cuckoo, Three Girls), explores her big strong strength. glive.co.uk

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Luisa Omielan – Work in Progress
■ Camberley Theatre, Camberley ■ Fri 16 Apr

Luisa Omielan – the most famous female British comedian you’ve never heard of – is bringing her socially-distanced Work In Progress stand-up who to Surrey ahead of the 2021 tour of her new show, God Is A Woman. camberleytheatre.co.uk

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Lucy Porter – Be Prepared
■ Epsom Playhouse ■ Sat 24 Apr
& Sat 22 May

Dig out our Brownie uniform, Lucy Porter returns with her latest stand up show and we reckon your tea making badge may come in handy. Despite what Brown Owl told you, an emergency 10p for the phone box and a competent knot, cannot solve everything. Life’s slightly more complicated than that. epsomplayhouse.co.uk

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Romesh Ranganathan – The Cynic’s Mixtape
■ G Live, Guildford ■ Tues 11 and Wed 12 May

The nation’s favourite self-deprecating cynic is back to talk about all the biggest scams we’re subject to as a nation. This could be close to the bone this year, but you be the judge of that, it’ll defo be a chuckle. glive.co.uk

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Jimmy Carr – Terribly Funny
■ Richmond Theatre ■ Tues 11 May and Tues 3 Aug

Performing not once, but twice in Guildford this year. Having political correctness at a comedy show is like having health and safety at a rodeo. Not for the easily offended, but definitely for anyone who loves the LOLs. Jimmy’s brand new stand-up show contains jokes about all kinds of terrible things. Terrible things that might have affected you or people you know and love. You’ve been warned. glive.co.uk
Jimmy Carr also comes to G Live in Guildford on Sat 29 May and Wed 14 July, and the New Victoria Theatre in Woking on 2 Aug.

•••

Giles Brandreth – Break a Leg!
■ Dorking Halls ■ Sat 15 May

The multi talented Brandreth is back on tour with his new show celebrating all things theatrical. Expect wit, wisdom, high drama, low comedy, and hilarious name-dropping. dorkinghalls.co.uk

•••

Reginald D Hunter – Bombe Shuffleur
■ Dorking Halls ■ Sun 30 May

Climate change. Mass unemployment. Economic pandemics. The rise of global fascism. So what could this man possibly say to upset you? Welcome to the world of the Bombe Shuffleur, Reginald D Hunters brand new show. dorkinghalls.co.uk

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Daniel Sloss – Hubris
■ G Live, Guildford ■ Wed 2 June

Daniel Sloss is one of Scotland’s biggest comedy exports. He was only 14 when Frankie Boyle used some of his material on Mock The Week, he performed his first Edinburgh Fringe show at 17 and critics around the world LOVE him! So don’t mis the chance to see his latest brilliantly dark stand-up show Hubris. glive.co.uk

•••

Ian Ashpitel and Jonty Stephens as Eric and Ern
■ Yvonne Arnaud Theatre, Guildford ■ Thurs 24 and Fri 25 June

a brilliant homage to Morecambe and Wise crammed full of their most loved routines, songs and sketches. A good one for the whole family. yvonne-arnaud.co.uk

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Jenny Eclair: Sixty! (FFS)
■ Rose Theatre, Kingston ■ Fri 25 June

The 60’s babe contemplates another decade of decrepitude and asks: is it a legal requirement to buy Nordic walking poles? rosetheatre.org

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Sarah Millican – Bobby Dazzler
■ G Live, Guildford ■ Thurs 26 & Fri 27 Aug

Sarah Millican never fails to make us howl with laughter, her observational comedy is bang on, especially when it comes to the uniquely tragi-comic experiences of women. She’s our generation’s Victoria Wood, go with you girlfriends for maximum hilarity. glive.co.uk

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The Scummy Mummies Show
■ Epsom Playhouse ■ Thur 2 Sept

Comedians Helen Thorn and Ellie Gibson are bringing their bonkers comedy show to the Epsom. Based on the UK’s number one kids and family podcast, the Scummy Mummies celebrate everything from drinking wine at teatime to hiding from the PTA (standard Muddy behaviour). Not to be missed. epsomplayhouse.co.uk

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Ed Byrne – If I’m Honest
■ The Harlequin Theatre, Redhill ■ Sat 4 Sept

Ed Byrne is one of the most successful comedians performing in the UK, regularly appearing on TV and touring to sold-out theatres. In this touring show he takes a long hard look at himself and tries to decide if he has ANY traits that are worth passing on to his children. harlequintheatre.co.uk
■ Ed is also appearing at Epsom Playhouse on Sun 12 Sept, and Dorking Halls on Sat 9 Oct.

•••

Jon Richardson – The Knitwit
■ Dorking Halls ■ Sun 12 Sept

A cardigan-wearing man moaning for two hours doesn’t sound like a hilarious comedy proposition. However, TV panel show stalwart and British Comedy Award nominee Jon Richardson’s gentle complaining about modern life is always entertaining – ‘where comedy meets knit picking in his new show The Knitwit. dorkinghalls.co.uk

•••

Katherine Ryan – Missus
■ Dorking Halls ■ Thurs 16 Sept

The funny girl takes time off the box (The Duchess, HIGNFY, Taskmaster, Glitter RoomIn Trouble…) to go on tour and talk about how herhilarious new perspectives on life, love, and what it means to be Missus. dorkinghalls.co.uk

•••

Emily Atack: Has Left the Group
■ Epsom Playhouse ■ Wed 29 Sept

I’m a Celeb, Celebrity Juice, her own show (nominated in the 2020 Comedy Awards), 1.7m followers on IG – and now the ultimate accolade: a gig in Epsom where she’ll bring her trademark humour, honesty and playfulness to explore everything from work to dating to her latest obsession… leaving a WhatsApp Group. epsomplayhouse.co.uk

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Omid Djalili – The Good Times Tour
■ Epsom Playhouse ■ Thurs 30 Sept

After experimenting with a Zoom gig where he got muted by 639 people and a Drive-in gig where Omid witnessed an audience member get out his car, attach a hose pipe to his exhaust and feed it through the window; multi award-winning comedian and actor Omid Djalili returns to the stage. epsomplayhouse.co.uk
■ Omid also comes to Camberley Theatre on Thurs 28 Oct.

•••

THEATRE

Crimes, Camera, Action
Crimes, Camera, Action harks back to the golden era of Hollywood in this whodunnit. It comes to Yvonne Arnaud Theatre in Guildford on Thurs 8 April.

Crimes, Camera, Action
■ Yvonne Arnaud Theatre, Guildford ■ Thurs 8 Apr

Bath-based theatre company New Old Friends will take you back to golden era Hollywood and the world of hard-boiled private eye Stan Shakespeare who’s investigating the case of a screen starlet who was stabbed as a result of a prop mix-up on set. yvonne-arnaud.co.uk

•••

Groan Ups
■ Yvonne Arnaud Theatre, Guildford ■ Mon 12 – Sat 17 Apr

From the team behind The Play That Goes Wrong comes Groan Ups – a brand new comedy all about growing up. It follows an unruly classroom of six year-olds on their journey through anarchic high school teenagers to the challenges of adulthood. yvonne-arnaud.co.uk

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Friends! The Musical Parody
■ The Harlequin Theatre, Redhill ■ Thurs 29 Apr

Not to be confused with Friendsical, this hit New York and Las Vegas show lovingly lampoons one of TV’s all-time greatest shows celebrating its most iconic moments as Ross, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, Joey and Rachel sing and dance their way back into our hearts. harlequintheatre.co.uk
■ The tour also stops off at New Victoria Theatre in Woking on Sun 9 May and Richmond Theatre on Mon 10 May.

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The Kite Runner
■ New Victoria Theatre, Woking ■ Tues 11 – Sat 15 May

Adapted from Khaled Hosseini’s hugely popular novel, The Kite Runner follows the story of two young boys living in Afghanistan. A beautiful afternoon in Kabul is the setting for the annual kite flying tournament, but no one could predict the horrifying turn of events that change the boys lives forever. atgtickets.com

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The Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde
■ Yvonne Arnaud Theatre, Guildford ■ Tues 18 – Sat 22 May

A thrilling adaptation of Robert Louis Stevenson’s dark psychological fantasy, this production will immerse you in the myth and mystery of 19th century London’s fog-bound streets where love, betrayal and murder lurk at every chilling twist and turn. yvonne-arnaud.co.uk

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Friendsical the Musical
■ Yvonne Arnaud Theatre, Guildford ■ Thurs 27 – Sat 29 May

Inspired by the hit TV show Friends, this 2019 Edinburgh Festival smash hit parody revisits Ross, Rachel and the gang in musical form with new tunes such as ‘Richard’s Moustache’ and ‘You’re Over Me, When Were You Under Me?’. Expect pure parody with a few familiar tales thrown in for good measure. yvonne-arnaud.co.uk

•••

Everybody’s Talking About Jamie
■ New Victoria Theatre, Woking ■ Mon 21 to Sat 26 June

Everybody’s talking about hit West End musical Everybody’s Talking About Jamie, and it’s going on tour with Layton Williams and Shane Richie continuing in the roles of Jamie and Hugo/Loco Chanelle. The only Surrey stop is Woking – so be quick if you want to catch this one. atgtickets.com

•••

The Addams Family
■ New Victoria Theatre, Woking ■ Tues 13 to Sat 17 July

Everyone’s favourite kooky family take to the stage for this musical comedy which has Samantha Womack in the role of Morticia and Cameron Blakely as Gomez. It’s a heart-warming story of love, family and friendship… with a twist! atgtickets.com

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9 to 5 – The Musical
■ New Victoria Theatre, Woking ■ Tues 10 to Sat 14 Aug

Dolly Parton’s smash hit musical comes direct from London’s West End telling the story of three workmates pushed to boiling point by their sexist and egotistical boss. This is a show that’s all about teaming up, standing up and taking care of business! atgtickets.com

•••

Footloose
■ New Victoria Theatre, Woking ■ Mon 6 – Sat 11 Sept

Oh my little Gareth Gates, how you’ve grown. The 16-year-old Pop Idol winner has long swapped sickly pop hits for a career in musicals. I’ve seen him in a couple along the way and he’s quite the pro. Go see for yourself when he demonstrates six-degrees-of-Kevin-Bacon in the musical version of Footloose. atgtickets.com

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Crimes in Egypt
■ Yvonne Arnaud Theatre, Guildford ■ Wed 8 and Thurs 9 Sept 24

New Old Friends theatre company (they have some pretty great creds, awards-wise) make a return to Guildford with this production – a classic whodunnit, comedy thriller about a holiday cruise along the river Nile. yvonne-arnaud.co.uk

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Noughts and Crosses
■ Richmond Theatre ■ Tues 21 – Sat 25 Sept

This gripping Romeo and Juliet story by award winning novelist Malorie Blackman and adapted by Sabrina Mahfouz is a captivating drama of love, revolution and what it means to grow up in a divided world. atgtickets.com

•••

Sh*t faced Shakespeare – Romeo and Juliet
■ Camberley Theatre ■ Sat 9 Oct

This is culture with a distinctly Muddy-feel. Enjoy one of the Bard’s top tales, with one cast member chosen to chug some booze in the hours leading up to the show. What can you expect? Complete hilarity, everything going slightly awry and probably a pretty accurate show comparison to what it would have been in Shakespeare’s era. Drink up! camberleytheatre.co.uk

•••

The Da Vinci Code
■ Yvonne Arnaud Theatre, Guildford ■ Mon 22 to Sat 27 Sept

Based on Dan Brown’s blockbuster novel, this is the world’s first stage adaptation which tells the story of Professor Robert Langdon and fellow cryptologist Sophie Neveu as they investigate a murder at the Louvre. yvonne-arnaud.co.uk

•••

MUSIC

Sophie Ellis-Bextor
Sophie Ellis-Bextor takes her Kitchen Disco on tour – stopping off at G Live in Guildford on Mon 17 May.

Marc Almond – Chaos and the Hits
■ G Live, Guildford ■ Mon 12 Apr

Eighties icon Marc Almond – best known for fronting synthpop duo Soft Cell performs songs from his most recent solo album ‘Chaos and a Dancing Star’ which was released in March last year. glive.co.uk

•••

Martin Kemp – Back to the 80s DJ set
■ G Live, Guildford ■ Sat 8 May

Star of Spandau, Kray brother and EastEnders heartthrob Martin Kemp hits the decks for an 80s nostalgia fest. You couldn’t ask for a higher authority on 80s tunes than Mr Kemp, so pull on your best ra-ra skirt and your biggest shoulder pads. We’re going in. glive.co.uk

•••

Sophie Ellis-Bextor – Kitchen Disco Tour
■ G Live, Guildford ■ Mon 17 May

Sophie’s Kitchen Discos offered a welcome spot of joy for thousands who tuned into her Insta Live on a Friday night when she delivered 30 minutes of dance-pop bangers. Now she’s bringing together all of the camp and frivolity of her original show to stages around the UK. glive.co.uk

Go West
■ The Rose Theatre, Kingston ■ Sun 23 May

The rock duo responsible for some of the biggest rock anthems of the 80s and 90s are still going strong – and to celebrate their 35th anniversary they’re going on tour! Their show in Kingston will feature special guests Gary Stevenson and Dave West. rosetheatre.org

•••

Texas – 30th Anniversary of Southside
■ G Live, Guildford ■ Fri 4 June

To celebrate 30 years since the release of Southside, Texas will play the album in its entirety as well as other hits on the rescheduled tour. Mega fans can buy the Ultimate VIP Experience, in which you’ll meet and have your picture taken with Sharleen Spiteri. glive.co.uk

•••

Tom Walker – Live after Racing
■ Lingfield Park Racecourse ■ Sat 5 June

The ‘Leave a Light On’ singer brings his tunes to Lingfield Park this summer. And it won’t be ‘Just You And I’, as we’d expect many a music lover to gather as the ‘Sun Goes Down’ to enjoy this fab evening of music after the races. lingfieldpark.co.uk

•••

Hampton Court Palace Festival
■ Hampton Court Palace, Hampton Court ■ Tues 8 – Sat 19 June

Revel in the joy of light summer evenings with a fortnight of concerts in the picturesque setting of Hampton Court. Confirmed artists include Rick Astley, Lionel Ritchie, Tom Jones, Bastille Re Orchestrated and George Benson. Get tickets early as they always sell out. hamptoncourtpalacefestival.com

•••

A Diva and a Piano – Lesley Garrett
■ Yvonne Arnaud Theatre, Guildford ■ Wed 9 June

Join Britain’s most popular soprano for a delightful evening of song, reminiscences and chat. Accompanied by Anna Tilbrook, Lesley’s behind-the-scenes stories and anecdotes will give audiences a unique insight into her life on the stage. yvonne-arnaud.co.uk

•••

Fascinating Aida
■ Dorking Halls ■ Sat 12 June

Dillie Keane, Adèle Anderson and Liza Pulman are returning to Dorking. Expect comedy, cabaret and some moves along the way, with a selection of old favourites, songs you haven’t heard before and some you wish you’d never heard in the first place. dorkinghalls.co.uk

•••

UB40
■ Lingfield Park Racecourse ■ Sat 26 Jun

Birmingham reggae and pop band UB40 will perform live after racing at Lingfield Park. Expect all the faves including Red Red Wine, I Got You Babe and The Way You Do the Things You Do. lingfieldpark.co.uk

•••

Kew the Music
■ Kew Gardens, Richmond ■ Tues 6 – Sun 11 July

With a line up that includes James Blunt, Van Morrison, Will Young and James Morrison, Dj Spoony and the Gipsy Kings performing on a different day from Wed to Sun. Get in early as tickets sell fast. kewthemusic.org

•••

 Jess Glynne – Live after Racing
■ Lingfield Park Racecourse ■ Sat 7 Aug

Get your glad rags on for a full day of racing then shuffle and sway to the stunning vocals of Jess Glynne – a Grammy-award-winning singer/songwriter taking to the stage at Lingfield Park this summer. lingfieldpark.co.uk

•••

Rick Astley
■ Lingfield Park Racecourse ■ Sat 11 Sept

The Eighties and Nineties crooner is never gonna give you up and he”s never gonna let you down, and he’s bringing his tunes to Surrey –  performing after the race meet at Lingfield Park Racecourse. lingfieldpark.co.uk

•••

DANCE

Vortice Dance Company presents Dracula
Vortice Dance Company presents Dracula at Fairfield Halls in Croydon in May.

Dracula
■ Ashcroft Theatre, Fairfield Halls, Croydon ■ Tues 11 May

Portugal’s prestigious Vortice Dance Company brings Bram Stoker’s classic novel to the stage in this show that promises to be an attack on the senses. fairfield.co.uk

•••

Ballet Black
■ Rose Theatre, Kingston ■ Tues 29 – Wed 30 June

Ballet Black is transforming the dance landscape giving a platform to artists of black and Asian descent as well as to new and established choreographic voices. Expect sensational solos, seductive duos and fiercely dynamic pieces performed seamlessly by the group. rosetheatre.org

Strictly presents the Power of Dance
■ Concert Hall, Fairfield Halls, Croydon ■ Wed 14 July

Strictly professionals Janette Manrara, Dianne Buswell, Amy Dowden and Neil Jones go on tour to tell something of what it is to be a dancer through stunning choreography and beautiful storytelling. fairfield.co.uk

•••

TALKS

John Lydon, Sex Pistols
The former Sex Pistols frontman brings his show to Dorking Halls and Epsom Playhouse this September

John Lydon: I Could be Wrong, I Could be Right
■ Dorking Halls ■ Thurs 9 Sept

An informal evening of chit chat and entertainment with John Lydon – aka Johnny Rotten – frontman and lyricist of the Sex Pistols and Public Image Ltd (PiL). Lydon will talk about how he sees life, and chat about his extraordinary career. The shows will coincide with the publication of his book, I Could Be Wrong, I Could Be Right. dorkinghalls.co.uk
John Lydon’s tour takes him to Epsom Playhouse on Tues 14 Sept.

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