The Muddy Guide
Chopping Chillies – Electric Theatre, Guildford – Fri 24 March
Written and performed by Clair Whitefield and directed by Olivier Award-winner Guy Masterson, Chopping Chillies was a hit at Edinburgh Festival last year. It’s a tale of love, loss and soul food about a cobbler and a cook, Katie and Ajna. Katie dreams of curries and Chapattis; Anja of hoy souls and reincarnation. Sounds like fun. Tickets are £14.
The Electric Theatre, Onslow St, Guildford GU1 4SZ. Tel: 01483 444789. guildford.gov.uk
Ross Noble: Brain Dump – Dorking Halls – Thurs 23 March
The quick-witted, often surreal, Geordie funny man has been a comedy favourite on both panel shows and the stand-up circuit for years. He’s known for his quick freewheeling comedy style and imaginative flights of fancy. Leave the kids at home though, it’s not recommended for those under 15. Tickets are £26.50. Show starts at 8pm.
Dorking Halls, Reigate Road, Dorking, RH4 1SJ. Tel: 01306 881717. dorkinghalls.co.uk
The Big Issues Exhibition – Watts Gallery – Artists’ Village, Compton – until 26 March
Last chance to catch this exhibition at Watts Gallery, which showcases art made by participants in the Big Issues outreach programme including prisoners at HMP Send, HMP/YOI Feltham and HMP Bronzefield, as well as young people from Surrey Youth Support Services and other Surrey-based community groups. The Big Issues project was established on the beliefs of G F and Mary Watts in providing Art for All. The Wattses cared about issues still prevalent today such as homelessness, pollution, exploitation and unemployment and they believed that art could transform lives.
Watts Gallery and Artists’ Village, Down Lane, Compton, GU3 1DQ. Tel: 01483 810235. wattsgallery.org.uk
Gag House Comedy – Cafe Mila, Godalming – Fri 31 March
The Godalming Gag House is now a regular club on the last Friday of each month. This month the line up includes Abi Roberts (above), whose known for her fast-paced, high-octane comedy. In her four years on the standup circuit, she’s supported Michael McIntyre, Sarah Millican, Jack Whitehall and Tom Stade. The line up also include Joe Wells will bring his own brand of political comedy and Addy Van Der Borgh. Tickets are £12.50.
Cafe Mila, Angel Court, High Street, Godalming GU7 1DT. Tel: 0333 666 3366. gaghousecomedy.com
Spring Plant Fair – RHS Wisley – Fri 24 to Sun 26 March
Pick up inspiration and advice from the Wisley Spring Plant Fair this weekend for your spring and summer garden. Specialist nurseries will be on hand to give advice, and a wide range of quality plants will be for sale. Begin with instant impact from colourful shrubs or start your summer by choosing bulbs and annual seeds for scent. It’s on from 9.30am to 4.30pm. Normal garden admission applies.
Wisley RHS Gardens, Woking, GU23 6QB. Tel: 0845 260 9000. rhs.org.uk
Joe Swift: A Man About the Garden, at Camberley Theatre, Thurs 23 March
TV presenter Joe Swift digs deep (geddit?) to tell the tale of his transformation from art-school drop-out to one of the country’s top Garden Designers (there’s hope for us all). The show sounds great, even if your fingers aren’t quite as green as you’d like them to be. He won’t be telling you how to keep your ailing plants limping along — his advice stops at, “just dig it up and put something else in and take responsibility: you killed it!” — but he’ll be entertaining the audience with tales from behind the potting shed and beyond. Tickets are £18. Show starts at 7.30pm.
Camberley Theatre, Knoll Road, Camberley, GU15 3SY. Tel: 01276 707600. camberleytheatre.biz
Spillikin – Farnham Maltings – Tues 28 March
Pipeline Theatre’s story of a woman with Alzheimers living with a robot companion is not only a deeply touching exploration of love, but it stars an amazing state-of-the-art robot as a full cast member. It premiered at the Edinburgh Fringe last year to rave reviews and was nominated for the Carol Tambor Best of Edinburgh Award. It’s best for kids aged 12+. Tickets are £12.
Farnham Maltings, Bridge Square, Farnham, GU9 7QR. Tel: 01252 745444. farnhammaltings.com
Million Dollar Quartet – New Victoria Theatre, Woking – Tues 28 Mar to Sat 1 April
From the West End, Las Vegas and Broadway comes the smash-hit musical inspired by the famous recording session in Memphis in 1956 which brought together rock ‘n’ roll icons Elvis Presley, Johnny Cash, Jerry Lee Lewis and Carl Perkins for the first and only time. Starring Peter Duncan as Sam Philips, the man who brought them all together. Toons include Blue Suede Shoes, Fever, That’s All Right, Sixteen Tons, Great Balls of Fire, Walk the Line, Whole Lotta Shakin’ Goin’ On, Who Do You Love? and Hound Dog.
New Victoria Theatre, The Ambassadors, Peacocks Centre, Woking, GU21 6GQ, Tel: 0844 871 7645. atgtickets.com
BOOK IT NOW
The Twits – Rose Theatre, Kingston – Wed 5 April to Sun 16 April
The Twits really are the most spiteful and revolting couple you could ever hope to meet. They spend their days playing wicked tricks on each other and mistreating Muggle-Wump monkeys. They also have a particularly sticky trick to catch Roly-Poly birds for their bird pies. This version at the Rose Theatre is directed by Max Webster (The Lorax at The Old Vic), promises to be just as disgusting and repulsive as earth worms disguised as spaghetti. Sound like a great Easter treat.
Rose Theatre, 24-26 High Street, Kingston, KT1 1HL. Tel: 020 8174 0090. rosetheatrekingston.org
Alice in Wonderland – Epsom Playhouse – Sat 8 April
This production from Ballet UK has been getting high praise from the critics, with the The Independent rating it in top five shows currently touring the UK. It’s based on Lewis Carroll’s much loved classic, directed by Ballet UK’s artistic director Christopher Moore, who by all accounts has created a captivating piece, brimming with wit, humour and charm. With its whimsical flights of the imagination, eclectic music and joyful dance, Alice in Wonderland promises to be delightful entertainment for all ages. Tickets are £15.50.
Epsom Playhouse, Ashley Avenue, Epsom, Surrey, KT18 5AL. Tel: 01372 724555. epsomplayhouse.co.uk
The Little Welly Goes Wild – Norbury Park – May 13 & 14
The event for small (aged four and over) people and their families, and it sells out waaay in advance every year so here’s your early shout out. It’s an epic obstacle course of 30 individual challenges over 3km of streams, woodland and mud near Box Hill, held in conjunction with the Surrey Wildlife Trust. The washing won’t be pretty but you’ll have a blast getting muddy. If you miss out on tickets for the Surrey version, there are also events in Oxfordshire and Hertfordshire.